Dreams of Reluctance

I get the feeling that I always have dreams lately where I see someone I know, look up to or even a fictional character I love but they never notice me in that dream. Sometimes when I dream about them for the first few times they do notice me and then they talk to me. But then after a while they rarely appear and almost never interact with me in that dream anymore. Either that, or they want to interact me or I’m too reluctant to approach them.

Sometimes I wonder what these dreams even mean. Remember the time I mentioned that I had a dream that I saw Gene Simmons at a restaurant and I was too nervous to approach him? There was also a time where I had a dream and I saw Optimus Prime standing somewhere outside the NEST base and I wanted to walk over to him but for some reason I was too reluctant to do so? Why is that? We both know that I would love to walk up to Gene in a dream and get an autograph and walk up to Optimus and watch the sunset with him, even sit on his shoulder if possible. What do these dreams mean? This is a question I wish I could find an answer to.

I think one possible answer for the ones when I see my idols but am nervous to approach them, is perhaps because I really want to meet them but it is not easy for me to do so whether it be a long distance away or a large amount of money that needs to be paid to either fly over to meet them or they are in my area but I still need to pay a helluva lot. Or maybe due to the fact that hundreds of other people I know have met my idols either they be people who were in the right place at the right time or they had enough money to spare for something else rather than their mortgage, car insurance, their child’s education, etc. and decided to spend it on this opportunity themselves, with their partners or with their kids and partners because they were die-hard fans and have been for years. And I envy them and really want that opportunity to come for me one day.

Recently I had another dream last night where Gene was running a record store and I walked into the store. He looked at me, I recognized him, and I desperately wanted to walk up to him and tell him how much I admire him and ask for an autograph with a photo. But sadly I never did. Later in the dream I spotted him sitting outside the store on a bench perhaps making a few calls and then I started walking towards him but stopped, turned around and started pacing back and forth for a long time trying to figure out what to say to him. I shouldn’t have spent that much time trying to figure out what to say when in reality I could say something as simple as: “Hello Gene, my name is Emily. I just wanted to say you’re amazing, and I like you because…….(reason why goes here)…….can I have your autograph? …” and so on.

On the bright side of this dream, I eventually saw Tommy Thayer inside the store Gene was working in and then I came up to him, said hello and I hugged him. He hugged me back and all of a sudden I wish it was real because Tommy is such a sweet guy.

All of a sudden I’m missing the dreams where I actually do interact with someone I look up to. I wish it would go back to being that way. But for now we’ll just have to see what happens.


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