If you’re like me, maybe you have a passion for bands. But sometimes, that passion is difficult because you want to interact with that band, especially if it’s not a very big well-known one.
In my case, the problem that comes into play is with Lordi. They are not a huge worldwide well-known band, but they have significant interactions with fans on almost a regular basis, thus it’s very easy for me to get jealous because seeing all those interactions make them appear bigger than they are.
I was inspired by this after hearing Mr. Lordi say this in an interview that was actually at the one Lordi concert I attended in 2017.
“To be loyal to some band that doesn’t come to your area, ever, I understand how it is, and my hat’s off.”
I value that. A lot of fans show their loyalty by following the band to as many gigs as possible and/or hoarding lots of merchandise. Sometimes these things are not always possible, especially the former and that is the hurdle of being a Lordi fan is living in a country that is not a frequent stop on the band’s tours. So, I’m going to talk about what you can do when you can’t see your favourite band and you find yourself easily envious of others, based on what I did when I was missing out on Lordi before and after I got to see them once.
1. Limit social media
Fans that get to see the band a lot either live in a convenient part of the world that is a frequent tour stop, or have enough money to travel to see them, will often be seen on social media sharing their experiences because social media is a place where everyone likes to share their best moments. The result is this has allowed us to only see through the lens of everyone’s positive events of life. Remember all those articles that tell you you should keep social media to a minimum when you’re unemployed and job hunting? Well, this is the same idea.
During my first few years as a Lordi fan, I was easily distraught on seeing all the photos of fans with the band and kept saying to myself: Why can’t it be me? As soon as I stepped away from those pages, I was able to feel better and didn’t get triggered over what I was missing. No drama + no jealousy = no problem
2. Focus on yourself
Don’t ever compare yourself to other fans, this dangerous move can lead to more insecurity. It’s like you have a crush on a guy but he already has a girlfriend and you’re jealous of her. Once I learned to step away from a lot of online interaction with fans, I started to think more of my current position as a fan of Lordi.
I realized that my own position was more important than anyone else’s. Sure, I hadn’t seen the band over ten times, met them more than three times, or had a massive collection of merchandise that overflowed my bedroom. But what I did have was devotion and loyalty, that is something I think is underappreciated by other fans and the band members themselves. I think the reason for that is it isn’t something that can be seen because it is found within the personality of each individual fan. Sadly, society has become a place where materialism and quantity are favored over moments, feelings and quality.
So, that is your first step to stop comparing yourself to other fans. Don’t you ever allow yourself to feel less of a fan because you don’t have what other fans have. Think about what you have instead, it doesn’t have to be a thing or a moment, it all starts with where the band lies in your heart.
3. Get some merchandise
Band merchandise can serve as a good consolation when you can’t see a band live.
You don’t have to have a massive stockpile of merchandise to feel better about missing out. At least, that’s what I choose to do. I pick what I want most and just buy that. Or if hoarding is your thing, knock yourself out as long as you don’t tell me what I am “missing” and need to obtain.
One of the hurdles I have to deal with, especially now with Lordi is that their online store was recently changed but shipping to my country is not available. I find this outrageous. Sure the band is aware they have fans in Canada and the US but they make our lives even harder because now not only do we rarely get to see the band live, but now we can’t get merchandise. I’ve resorted to making my own, so I made a 3D-print of the band’s logo and put it on one of my bracelets.
So there’s another option for you, buy the merchandise, or make your own. Not being able to see the band is bad enough.
4. Don’t let other fans tell you what to do
I can’t stand it, but I always don’t listen. Like, it drives me insane whenever I continue to advocate on a band’s Facebook or Instagram page that they need to come to my country, and then fans tell me that I should just take a trip to whatever country they are touring if I want to see them that badly.
Well, I would if I could, but I can’t because right now my life doesn’t permit me to. I work a full-time job and my hours are not the traditional 9-5 Monday to Friday. I also have chosen not to drive a car so that may also complicate things. I also like to take caution of managing my money, so if I were to plan a trip, I want to make sure I’m not broke after all the expenses involved are taken care of. So yeah, I can’t just drop everything and go down to a festival in Mexico or fly to Europe to follow a band on tour from Germany to Italy. Therefore, it would be easier if the band came to me instead of me going to them.
I think the fans who do do those things are more free-spirited than me and probably don’t have careers that are as demanding as mine, but I’m going to stop there because I don’t want to assume that is entirely true.
But yeah, you should just follow your heart and go to see the band when you can. No one can tell you how to live your life as a fan because the only person who knows your life best, is you. Not when others say you should. Save up your money, no matter how long it takes, and send some emails, speaking of which…
5. Contact booking agencies
This might help you some sort. Really want your favourite band to tour your city, or a major city near you? Start reaching out to local venues. Find out who is in charge of booking and shoot them an email that you want that band to be booked. Worst case scenario is they either don’t respond or say they can’t do it right now. But it’s worth a try right?
I did that with Lordi years before I saw them live. Sure, I could have kept doing it, but I ended up getting sidetracked. Hell, sometimes I think back to the day I emailed the booking agent from a small venue and got an automatic response that she was out of the office. Never heard anything back afterwards, but then coincidentally, Lordi came to play at that exact venue when they finally toured here. It’s like sending a job application, what have you got to lose?
6. Unite your local fanbase
I know I said watch your social media activity if you’re sensitive to getting jealous and want to avoid drama, but there’s a positive side to everything.
After seeing Lordi, my friend and I decided to make a Facebook page for the fans in our country and the US. After a couple of years, we’ve already grown significantly. I am hoping that it shows the fandom, and even the band themselves plus their management that we do exist and we are loyal. Who knows, maybe it’ll make us the official representatives of the North American Lordi fanbase! I don’t know if it’ll increase the chances of Lordi touring here, but you never know. It isn’t easy searching for fans in the street so social media is a great way to do this.
So, if you haven’t done that, either find a page that represents your local fanbase or if there isn’t one, start your own!
And that is my advice to you if you’re in the same pickle like me battling self-esteem as a fan of a band. It doesn’t just apply to Lordi, but to all bands I love that don’t tour my country on a regular basis.
I hope these tips help and do tell me a band you love that doesn’t tour your country and how you cope with it if you’re unable to travel.